Of Saints and Sinners
"And?" I was baffled.
"And because he had sponsors."
"Are you serious?"
I looked at his friends' calm reaction.
They knew.
"So let me get this straight, aside from his wife and kids, and you, he also has sponsors?"
"Yes. Two actually. A COO from a private hospital and a Dean from a university."
"And that is totally fine with you?"
"You know, G, at first it was not. Not at all. I nearly begged off our relationship. But I thought about it and looked from his perspective. It's not so bad. I guess. I mean the sponsors are actually a bit old. about 50 plus already." Michael continued while I gazed into his eyes trying to observe further his reactions. "The way I see it, since they're older, I don't think I need to be jealous."
His answer was direct, blunt. He must have thought it through a lot of times.
"So your time from him is 6 to 9pm. When does he meet his 'sponsors?'" I quote-unquoted in mid-air.
"If I call him in the morning, about until 5pm, and he does not answer. I know he is with one of them."
"Man, that is complicated Michael. I swear."
"So what was the string that pulled everything?"
"One day I just realized..." He took a deep breath. "...that I couldn't be his other option anymore."
And those were the words - an option.
"I stopped communicating from texts to calls to social networking sites. I stopped everything."
"Like what I said earlier, there was no closure. I couldn't face him anymore."
"I see."
"It was painful, G. There were nights I couldn't sleep and there were times I just wanted to sleep all day."
"Of course Michael. Six years is six years. A partner is a partner."
Silence surrounded the living room area.
"But that was months ago, nearly a year. I have moved on G."
I wanted to believe him, I really do. But his words, they speak of hurt, of ongoing process.
Of a still open wound.
"So...what if, hypothetically, you accidentally see him and his wife together in a mall, would you go to him and greet him?"
"No."
"I thought you have moved on, Michael?" I interrupted.
He fell silent. A dead one.
"You're contradicting your statements." I told him.
He smiled weakly to me.
And then I smiled back.
And finally finished the Tanduay Ice I was drinking.
Part 3
"And because he had sponsors."
"Are you serious?"
I looked at his friends' calm reaction.
They knew.
"So let me get this straight, aside from his wife and kids, and you, he also has sponsors?"
"Yes. Two actually. A COO from a private hospital and a Dean from a university."
"And that is totally fine with you?"
"You know, G, at first it was not. Not at all. I nearly begged off our relationship. But I thought about it and looked from his perspective. It's not so bad. I guess. I mean the sponsors are actually a bit old. about 50 plus already." Michael continued while I gazed into his eyes trying to observe further his reactions. "The way I see it, since they're older, I don't think I need to be jealous."
His answer was direct, blunt. He must have thought it through a lot of times.
"So your time from him is 6 to 9pm. When does he meet his 'sponsors?'" I quote-unquoted in mid-air.
"If I call him in the morning, about until 5pm, and he does not answer. I know he is with one of them."
"Man, that is complicated Michael. I swear."
"So what was the string that pulled everything?"
"One day I just realized..." He took a deep breath. "...that I couldn't be his other option anymore."
And those were the words - an option.
"I stopped communicating from texts to calls to social networking sites. I stopped everything."
"Like what I said earlier, there was no closure. I couldn't face him anymore."
"I see."
"It was painful, G. There were nights I couldn't sleep and there were times I just wanted to sleep all day."
"Of course Michael. Six years is six years. A partner is a partner."
Silence surrounded the living room area.
"But that was months ago, nearly a year. I have moved on G."
I wanted to believe him, I really do. But his words, they speak of hurt, of ongoing process.
Of a still open wound.
"So...what if, hypothetically, you accidentally see him and his wife together in a mall, would you go to him and greet him?"
"No."
"I thought you have moved on, Michael?" I interrupted.
He fell silent. A dead one.
"You're contradicting your statements." I told him.
He smiled weakly to me.
And then I smiled back.
And finally finished the Tanduay Ice I was drinking.
Part 3
We accept the love we think we deserve.
ReplyDeleteDitto at JM.
ReplyDeleteHe was number 4, then. I was once a number 3, and it was as worse as being number 2 or number 5, so long as you were not number 1.
i value honesty, and that guy's duplicitous to everyone else except Michael.
ReplyDelete