Sei. Ikiru.

Tuesday night I messaged my good friend.

"Hey K Happy LaboracayI I hope you enjoy!"

"Hey G. Tapos na kami mag-Boracay. Kamusta ka?" He replied.

"I am okay. Ito pauwi pa lang from work. Pagod but happy. Salamat."

"Can I call you?" He asked.

We haven't talked for a while which made me feel uneasy.

"Uh..Sige but I'll keep you posted as I am still on my way home."

I was still waiting for my turn at the tricycle station.

"Sure." He said.

"Just got home." I messaged him after a few minutes.

"Wag kang magugulat ha and relax ka lang. Okay, G?"

"Okay Karl." I replied. "Ano ba kasi ito?" I was already feeling uncomfortable and queasy.

"Si B. He passed away recently. While he was traveling in Portugal."

Inaalala ko si B. Hindi ko siya mamukhaan nung sinabi niya ito. I forgot his face and how he looks - what role he played in my life and vice-versa.

"I see."

Karl let out a deep sigh.

"G, I feel sad. B has been a friend for years. Siya ang inaaya ko before when I go out of town. Madali kasi siyang yayain. Game lagi to go to places."

He sighed once more.

Honestly, inaalala ko pa rin si B. Alam ko narinig ko na yung pangalan niya before. I know I've met him in one of the house parties that I've attended but I still couldn't match his name to his face.

"How'd you know he left?" I asked to keep the conversation getting as well as making sure he vents out well.

"D messaged me recently. Sabi niya: Don't be alarmed G ha. I have something to tell you..."

D is also one of the people I've met during one of the house parties I've attended. He and B were close.
"So apparently while traveling, he had an asthma attack..."

We fell silent for a moment. Pinakiramdaman ko ang hininga ni K. I also was trying to assess myself on what questions I would ask next. If questions were actually relevant at that time.

"When was the last time you saw each other?" I inquired once more.

"January this year before he left. What's ironic is that he was actually based in Davao na and just went back here in Manila to fly to Europe." He let out a quick sigh. "Buti nakapagkita pa kami before he left."

"Yun na lang ang iniisip ko G."

Tinamaan ako sa sinabi niya.

G was actually right.

You can never tell life. It is one of those YOLO moments that life is so unpredictable.

I fell silent once more.

"Pero happy ako nagkita pa kami. And at least he died doing what he loved doing - to travel the world."

Bigla ko na siyang naalala.

Oo nga! Si B! I remembered him perfectly. Mahilig nga siyang lumabas ng Manila at ng bansa. Last time we talked he was learning the German language kasi gusto niyang pumunta ng Germany.

'"Malungkot ako G. I lost a friend and a travel buddy. He meant so much. Pero ganoon talaga ang buhay, "It is what it is,"' K concluded.

I resonated: "It is, what it is."

And as we bade each other good night, I stayed on the chair for a few more minutes just reminiscing the times B and I shared, even for a few times.

You had a good life, B. Salamat sa mga pang-aasar mo sa akin bakla ka...






"But memories are time beings too, like cherry blossoms or ginkgo leaves; for a while they are beautiful, and then they fade and die." Naoko Yasutani, A Tale for the Time Being by Ruth Ozeki



*Five strokes. Sei. Ikiru. To live. For Now. For the Time Being.

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